Third Rock from the Sun
by Joe Diffie
She walks into Smokey's one hip at a time
Like a broken field runner slipping through the line
He likes the way she looks so he calls the lil' wife
Says, "Don't wait up for me, I'll be working late tonight"
Wife hangs up the phone, bursts into tears
Calls he sister up and cries, "Get over here."
Sister tells he boyfriend, "Be back in a while"
Boyfriend wants a beer, the store it just a mile
He leaves the motor running, he'll only be a minute
His car drives away with teenagers in it
The driver tells he buddies, "Got one life to live"
They scream into the night, "Let's get it over with"
Cause and effect, chain of events
All of the chaos makes perfect sense
When you're spinning round, things come undone
Welcome to Earth, third rock from the sun
Kids gun the gas, car starts to swerve
Heads for a semi, truck jumps the curb
Truck hits the Big Boy in Shoney's parking lot
Who flies through the air, takes out the bank clock
Clock strikes a light pole, transformer sparks
Lines go down, the town does dark.
Waitress calls the cops, says she saw it all
Swears a giant alien has landed at the mall
Cops ring up the mayor say, "There's panic in the streets,
Hate to wake you up, but we can't find the chief"
Mayor says, "Use your head, if he ain't in his car
He's hiding from his wife down at Smokey's bar"